Connecting and Communicating

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Transcript

One of the keys to doing well as we go through life's big stuff issues is understanding what we're going through. So understanding the next is labels, communications having a common language approach. And we're really big at resiliency flight for a common language approach because it helps make it safer to talk to others. So we lose phrases that pull us down or make us feel stupid. We use phrases that people just go, Ah, yeah, okay, I understand. I've been there myself and we build engagement, we build compassion.

We build a sense of togetherness, no judgment, because it's a safety issue. So I want to talk about the first four key pieces of common language and four states of being in our model. And that's about the energies we all have in life. And most of us have 123 of these that we really are good at and enjoy and we almost all have one Some of us as many as three that we don't enjoy, and they're hard to achieve and stay in. So there's no judgment here. Just be gentle with others who don't have the same gifts of energy as you do.

So the first one is quiet energy. And that's, for example, some of us can fall asleep with ease. Mean, six or seven nights a week. I fall asleep like a log. I've had people say, how do you do that? I don't know.

I just do. But then with hindsight, there's calmness before bed. A warm drink. Lower no caffeinated. You prepare. I like to read in bed before bedtime.

Helps calm me down. Right ever I read. so quiet energy when we're sleeping. When we are so quiet, that others can't really even sense we're there unless they see us. So a sleeping baby. But that's a physical us.

But then there's the emotional calm There's the physical calm, emotional, calm, intellectual calmness, what's going on in your head. So that's one type of energy. Not good or bad, but a powerful state of being for our rational emotional and physical health, if we can achieve it for six to nine hours every day, during sleep as one state, the next energy is slow energy, what we see, think, feel or hear. So I have a neighbor, and she's a real Dynamo. But she's over 85. Now, she's not as fast as she was 20 years ago.

And so she uses a walker, but she uses it with grace and dignity and ease. So it's not fast, but she gets there, always gets there. So that's one type of slow energy. For those of us of a certain age. The rollers they used to call them steam rollers. They go along and they put pavement down and they roll it flat.

Make it tough. They can be quite quiet. Or quiet energy could be quietly sitting. cup of tea, good book, favorite notepad maybe you're lying down looking up under a tree and watching the breeze, shimmer the leaves is a favorite way for me to be quiet and slow. It's beautiful theater. So that's the second energy, third energy, loud energy.

What we hear is loud people at a party conversations mixing and mingling and crashing together. Good music as a seven year old and a rather competitive child. Did I say rather sorry, Mum as a very competitive child. I was loud. I didn't want to hurt you playing tag, but I was going to win. racing cars.

Have you ever been to a race? And the motorcars go past screaming past you? How many? dozens or hundreds of miles an hour? Of course with electric car races coming soon, they might be awfully quiet. But loud energy rocket ships in launch mode.

Ever had a crying baby in your arm that's teething. at two in the morning. Nothing seems louder. And then last, the fourth energy, and these are in no particular order. What we see think hear or feel, how fast do we think? How fast do we talk?

How fast do we move? bikes going downhill? As a teenager, my friend's older brother who had a driver's license drove in front of me, and I achieved 33 miles an hour going down a hill. told you I like fast and loud, was great. playing tag in the playground can be loud can be fast. Running sports, used to be in sales had a sales career.

That can be real fast. point the point you got to play with it, you got to meet some sales deadlines. You got to crunch some numbers, you got to go, go, go, go go. It's rather exhilarating in balance. But if we get stuck in any one of the four energies at any point in time for more than a little bit, we can stagnate. It's not as good for us and our relationships, our career, our health.

If we stay in one or two, we're going to balance them in the course of a day, a week, a month, a lifetime. Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. So are you ready? buckle up. Let's get ready to roll and talk about three life affirming roles.

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