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Get outta the house- Donna Mansell

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You've done it, you survived, wait three dots to get a bit better now you start to feel, you know, things have happened and you've got through them, you've got problems with solutions. You seem to know your baby a little bit better now, which is excellent. And he's starting to feel quite confident with the things that you're doing many times a day like nappy changing, feeding, positioning this baby. You know, how do they like to go to sleep and you know, the fact that you are starting to get a little bit more sleep at night, hopefully, which is working well. And so much. This week, there's not quite as many changes in your body actually.

You're bleeding settles down, your boobs are feeling better. You're really getting your To that full and empty feeling, and your nipples are feeling better again, if you a bottle failing and you've suppressed to multiply your milk supplies is gone, your boobs are back to doing what they did before, which is a nice feeling. So yeah, you do realize, though, that you've just got a little bit of extra love that you didn't have. And week three is a funny time in you and your body because your body's been very busy and very noisy about what it's been doing. And now it's just kind of there and you're like, so how long is this extra love take to go. And you know, my rule of thumb is it takes as long as it took to get on there.

Like it doesn't just come off like that. The Quick Fix diets and plans. They're all bullshit. Let's call it as it is uncle and bullshit on them. They don't work. I have other repercussions, you know, you tend to tend to put more weight on than what you actually lost.

So you need to love that this body made your baby you need to not want it to go away because you know it is there for a while. Physically you're only just getting back into little walks and you know, you'll be hearing all of the great advice from the physio about what your body should be up to. And so you know, you're not training things you need to buy or running for a marathon or you're gonna mess everything up and it's not gonna feel nice at all. So you still will be losing a little bit of weight, the nutrient need for breastfeeding is huge. And you do start to get a bit tired and fatigued and find that you're snacking and I guess think do I am I snacking because I feel like I need a piece of chocolate to pick me up. Or am I snacking on bad food because I'm not preparing for the day and you can easily make those two changes by preparing a bit more.

But you know, your maternity clothes don't fit your other clothes don't fit. You think I can't wear my leisurewear everywhere. So go to the shop, buy your in between size you might not buy, you know the most expensive clothes but ultimately, that's going to make you feel better about you and take some of the pressure off to fit back into those pants that let's be honest, are not going to fit for a little while. So love yourself that's number one message for this week. So as I said boobs and nipples should all be feeling good, which is great. And if it's not, it's you know, something that's probably sitting on the outside of normal for this week.

So you know, post a question on the Facebook page or you know, if you're still seeing your midwife today look, still hurting a bit and you know, we can make some adjustments. Sometimes you fall into a bad behavior with positioning like you just get a bit lazy And a few little tweaks and we've got that problem solved in no time, baby. And we touched on sleep and set laying. You've got some great information from Brooke and the sleep psychologist about the sleep and settling cues and expectations of sleep. And, you know, this is a huge industry so I can fit like, everyone feels like if there's a plan, then you can have your baby sleeping as you think it should be. Doesn't happen like that.

No, it does not. And, you know, I've just got to two books here. Not necessarily books I'd recommend but just to have many I've got more books behind me on sleep and settling. You know, everyone can write a book. You know, Pinky McKay is an example of a lactation consultant, who's who's got some great information for new parents about you know, encouraging them to trust their babies. Babies and trust themselves.

But she's a breastfeeding expert. And so you know, would we really get like unsettling advice, specifically from her? Or one of the most well purchase books on flipping that link is written by babysitter. So does she know about why your baby's not sleeping? or specific ways to get that on track? Probably not.

So I always encourage you to look in the front cover of a book, if you're gonna buy it and go Who wrote this? Or if you're reading some information on the internet, Who wrote this? Is that someone that you would consider an expert in that area? Or is it just someone that you've stumbled across that someone told you to look at? And are they the best valuable resource? Is it going to be helpful?

Maybe not. And remember, it's about getting to know this little baby and getting to know you as a parent. You know, you might find that your partner's really happy to let the baby cry for five minutes. But it feels like someone's ripping your heart out. And you can't cope with it. And so you know, there might need to be some compromise and some discussions in that relationship about what you are going to do as parents, because before your first baby, you were split for it.

And now you're making these joint decisions, and you have slightly different takes on that. It's a good conversation rather than an argument. Or I'm doing it this way, you know, because there's probably something could be deeper coming out of that than what you think and remember that you learnt how to be a parent, from your parents. So if you look at your partner's parents and you think then nothing like my parents, then of course your partner is going to have a different way of wanting to do it because that's where he learned to or she, so you know, just be mindful. I'm not saying that he Or ci or what, whatever is right or wrong, it's just about thinking about what really is going on. And then you're in a much better place to step forward with that.

Most of the time your partner is going back to work at about this stage and you have or just about to and you're like, How can I be in charge you Danny and what am I gonna do? And you know, how will I ever get out of my pajamas or, you know, where's my backup and, or you're like, I'm just really lonely and it's really boring. And you know, you feel really jealous that you're at home and they get to go out and they just walk out the door with their wallet and their keys and their phone and you think lug around this big bag. And I guess that morning, it's normal. It's a morning of a life that you used to have and that you can say it's not going to be one that you have for a while now. And you know, you You're gonna be at home with the baby, it is going to get better.

You know, it's kind of your job now is to raise this baby and you know, you get government support to stay home and do that. So that's how important that is. But it's different, you know, you feel a bit isolated, a bit lonely, a bit overwhelmed, tired, cranky, all of those emotions. But I think it's really helpful to even just start the day and go for a walk in the morning. You know, take the baby, pop them in the frame, just stop for a little walk around the block just so you get confident that getting out on your own. You might connect with other mums.

On on, you know, this program, they might have some little things that they go out and do they find helpful. And it might be that you've got a good friend and now we're going to come to you and he's go, maybe I'll meet you at the coffee shop around the corner and then you've got out and you've got someone to help you if you need it. I guess we were in Facebook or other social media, people are very keen to write things that might may or may not be true or be a bit more judgmental. And that's not fair. And, and it's not helpful. So, you know, if you're on a Facebook group and everyone's just great and fabulous, and they're all excellent and you just having a bad day, and you know, they make you feel bad about that, then it might not be the right environment for you to be in.

So it's an evolution. So it's just starting that change. The last thing I was going to talk about was expressing, because yes, if you are feeling really trapped, and like, you know, you're the only one that can feed the baby. You know, sometimes having that option of expressing so that you can put the milk in the fridge or the freezer. It's quite an important thing to do. So you know, I always say there'll be a fact sheet on this.

Expressing in the morning. is when you're going to get your most volume of milk, their milk storage stuff is all in the feeding book, as well as on on the resource link, so you know where to store it and all that kind of business. So if the baby had one boob and a beat, you would express this second side for five or 10 minutes and that might give you 30 or 40 mils. You might do that the next morning, and so then you've got a full bottle of 80 mils that you could use for just about a full fade. The Quarter volumes will also be written down so you can work that out for your baby. But don't feel like you can take 150 meals out at once because we just want to take a little bit so we're not affecting the day's supply.

But still giving you that option that you can go out your partner can give the baby a bottle. You know you can nip to the shops and not feel like you have to race back so it can be in the fridge or the freezer if you need it. But for some moms, this is a really good Good time to just have that so that there's some balance in in everything for you that you can leave or you know, if the baby didn't need a feed, it doesn't matter. You just pop that milk in the freezer and you've got it for next time when you go to the gala ball or something like that, which will be fun. And look, life will go on. But it's the it's not as crazy this week, but it's the it's the beginning of a new phase.

So, you know, think about what's important to you and hopefully take someone board, take on board some of that new information. Why is it looking at things but have a good week. Hopefully you enjoyed the other experts on this week and get some great confidence

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