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Labor and delivery coach

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Transcript

Hey husband here. I'm really excited about this video because something I truly believe is an incredible opportunity for you and your wife to bond together through this experience of your wife caring and delivering this baby. And that is you been her labor coach. in past videos, specifically, the one where I sat down with Frank and we talked to have a conversation about some things to expect some questions, he added some uncertainties. I said, hey, it's not about you and the situation. It's about your wife.

It's about how you can help her through this process. Well, now, I'm going to tell you that you got to think it's about you. It's all about you. Here's why I say that. Think about this. Say your wife goes out and hires a doula or asked her mother or her sister to be her doula or labor coach, whatever the term is that she's using, who gets the opportunity to get the glory for helping her through this process?

Well, that would be either the doula her sister, her mom or whoever she decides to bring in to help her. So negates the ability for you to be able to be that husband hero to help her through this process, and to build a stronger and deeper relationship between you and her. So if you were doubting your abilities, if you are not encouraged if you were scared to death, to pursue being her labor coach while say right now take courage, be strong and go for it, because this is going to be something that you're gonna look back you and her together years from now and say, Wow, I'm so glad we did that we are so much stronger together because of that. So now let's dive into some tips and some ideas, the things to expect when approaching this process. The first one I want to talk about is that your wife was made to do this.

That might sound kind of trite. It's going to be a painful experience. She's going to go through a lot but truly she was made to do this. She was made to carry and deliver a baby. You might think well, what if she's in a ton of pain I can't handle see my wife and pain. I don't know what to do with that.

What if she's overwhelmed, she comes unglued and starts yelling and carrying on and that sounds really uncomfortable. Well, that's why you two need to have a conversation beforehand, need to set up the expectations between you and her something me and my wife did, my wife is not going to respond and react exactly the way your wife is. So I'm going to give you some ideas and some tips. But at the end of the day, there's some conversations that you will have to have with your wife. My wife shouldn't have a natural birth. So she said, I don't want any pain meds.

I don't want an epidural. I want to do this naturally. And so that allowed me to be confident when she had about six centimeters during her transitional phase said, then I don't know if I can do this. I looked at her and I had the power to look at her in the eyes and say, Yes, you can. Because you said you're going to do this. I believe that you can do this.

And in fact, you're already doing it. So keep it up. Keep up the great work. If we didn't have a previous conversation, where she told me don't let me get an epidural. I wouldn't have had the confidence to look her in the eyes and say, you're not getting an epidural. Because when a woman is in pain and overwhelmed, how hard is it to tell your wife, Hey, keep suffering through the pain girl.

You Got this when you are perfectly not in pain at all. That's why that conversation is crucial to know your wife's expectations aren't the next thing I want to talk about on this same topic is being overwhelmed by the pain. I kind of addressed that lightly. But I thought about it this way, if my wife got in a car accident, and she was rushed in the emergency room in an emergency situation, she was perhaps bleeding from her arm or she was unconscious, or she was in a coma, whatever it might be, think of an extreme situation, I would probably be overwhelmed because that is not a normal experience for her to go through. Our bodies are not specifically meant to have that sort of traumatic effect. And so I would say you're perfectly permitted to be overwhelmed by that pain and by that situation, but remember, your wife was created to do this.

So take confidence that you've put her in the hospital, you've put her in a safe place, and people are qualified to take care of her. And so she's suffering through normal pain. It's not happy. It's not pleasant, but it is normal. Okay, but What if your wife goes in for an emergency c section or she starts to bleed too much, and then that emergency situation happens. And that's not exactly normal?

Well, like I've said, You've put her in a hospital, you've put her in a place where people are qualified to take care of her. So from here, it's up to you and your wife to trusting God for the results of what will happen. And this is about having a pregnancy safe in faith. It's not about having a perfect pregnancy, not about having a flawless pregnancy. It's about having a pregnancy safe and in faith. Alright, so point number two, we're going to move into the breathing techniques.

This is where you really learn some of the stuff that helps you be the coach for your wife. If you've yet to go and watch the labor and delivery, breathing techniques video, go back there, watch that with your wife, I recommend watching that a handful of times in a perfect world start watching that six to eight weeks before your wife goes into labor. That way you can have those techniques ingrained in your mind. And you can know what to expect and how to coach her lead her and guide her along that process. So Head back and watch that as your wife heads into labor. So this is going to be when she first starts experiencing contractions, I would recommend if she wants to get out, walk around your neighborhood, get some fresh air, you're gonna be in the hospital quite a long time.

And so just get out and actually helps get your mind off of it. It helps the contractions work, what they need to do to get her to the point where she can deliver the baby. Now, there's gonna come a point when the contractions Come on too strong shoulder walk anymore, come inside, be there for her be by our side, get her what she needs, etc. Help. We're gonna do different breathing positions, as we talked about in the labor and delivery, breathing techniques video. Help her to remember to relax her face, relax your arms, relax her core, her legs, whatever it might be that she's really tensing up, she's tensing up, she's going to get sore and she's going to exhaust herself far faster than if she relaxes and she's going to have to be reminded of this over and over again.

That might be frustrating. You know, I've already told you this 100 times as you Just relax while she's going through a lot, she's trying to just focus on getting through the pain. And so you're gonna have to be there to remind her to relax. The one that my wife struggle with the most is she wanted to fight her contractions. So she clench your face up really tight and she would like tense up all you know, into like almost a ball, I would say you need to relax, you need to allow the contractions to do their work. Right now, like contractions are pushing the baby down to the delivery to the birth canal.

And the cervix is starting to open and so the contractions are helping the body to do that. Thank you so much for watching this video. I once again want to encourage you to be their husband hero to be the labor coach. It's gonna make all the difference in the world. In the opportunity you have to be in this labor delivery process right by your wife side as the husband hero. I have another video about helping your wife in the hospital.

I hope you go and watch that

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